Your life can change in 20 seconds
By Kerryn Vaughan
23rd May 2020
20 seconds truly can change your life. Specifically, I'm talking about 20 seconds of courage. Think about it. What can you do in 20 seconds?
Hit send on an email after procrastinating over it for 19 seconds
Dial somebody’s number to have that conversation
Walk up to somebody to say something
Text that important message
Hit publish on that first blog post
Post that post laden with vulnerability or sass
Put that draft book or play in the post box
Say yes to a decision you’ve been procrastinating
Hit the ‘live’ button on social media
Get in the car to go to that audition
Step onto the stage
Walk out your front door
There’s got to be thousands of other examples, but you get my point.
These can be life changing actions. The number one thing that holds us back (other than ourselves) is not stepping into courage.
Some will say it’s self-doubt or fear, but both of those can be overcome by taking courageous action. In fact action is the best antidote for fear!
Others will blame somebody else and let’s stop right here - I call bullshit on that! Unless you are in a situation that has your basic rights completely restricted (and some people are in that situation), then blaming somebody else is just a cop out. So let’s move on…
Then there’s the question of confidence v courage. In my work I have a stack of people telling me that they just don’t have the confidence. Most say ‘when I’m more confident’.
Well I hate to say it, but the only way to build confidence is by doing. And doing means taking a deep breath and getting on with it. That’s courage and it really is that simple.
Now I’m not saying it doesn’t hurt - sometimes it does. But nothing changes if nothing changes.
Let’s revisit confidence, and consider for a moment how courage trumps confidence every time. If we have the courage to do or try something, no matter how it turns out, we can count it as a success because we actually DID it. And each time we do it again, no matter what the outcome, we start to string all these small achievements and tiny successes together and that builds confidence.
20 seconds really can change your life.
Now I’m not suggesting we all start jumping out of planes or sticking our heads in a lion’s mouth. If we’re not trained or have sufficient safety nets in place, those things could be down right dangerous - stupid in fact!
To highlight the difference between courage and stupidity, let me tell you what I did once…
Some years back I was a teacher, and we took our students to one of those obstacle course type camps. You know the good old team building ones? Well, there was an underground tunnel about 50 meters long and only about 2 feet in diameter.
Your’s truly, terrified of tunnels and caves, decided to throw myself into that challenge belly first. Literally belly first! I had to crawl through this pitch black tunnel that curled and twirled through the suffocating stench of damp dirt, with barely enough room for my body.
Arms outstretched trying to feel the difference between the true tunnel path and the fake at Y intersections. Are you having trouble breathing just reading this? I am!
Yes I made it through, and somehow without having a heart attack, but why I did it had nothing to do with courage. No, I was showing off, trying to impress one of the camp workers I had taken a shine to.
Pretty dumb hey? To further highlight my stupidity, later that day a snake was spotted only a few metres away from the tunnel exit. So long story short, don’t be like Kerryn!
What I’m really talking about here are the little things that will make our lives better. The things, that if we do them, will help us achieve the goals we have been wanting to achieve but thought they were out of reach. I’m talking about fulfilling our dreams.
Everybody deserves that.
Courage, even just one tiny step at a time, is what pushes us out of our comfort zone - and we all know, that’s where the magic happens!
Kerryn Vaughan is the author of ‘Magnificent Kids!’ and ‘Get Off The Bench!’, founder of One Planet Classrooms, co-founder of Girls With Hammers, and host of Get Off The Bench Podcast